I'm a Hog for you Baby

As you may already know, one of my favourite things in the whole wide world is the zoo. I am particularly fond of Gay Sunday at London Zoo - a day when the faggots and muff tuckers get in cheaper and have a special little NO STRAIGHTS ALLOWED area to sit on the grass and drink cocktails.

I went to the first Gay Sunday back in 2006 and there were plenty of homos in attendance, unfortunately yesterday they were somewhat slimmer on the ground. I hope this doesn't deter the zoo from carrying on the tradition next year - and, as an FYI, if they could make it GAYS ONLY that would be even better.

My other favourite thing at the moment is my brand-new-even-though-I-couldn't-afford-it camera (well Kate's pictures of the Drag Ball came out better than mine and I couldn't have that could I?) It's a Sony Cyber Shot W190 in black and it's LUSH, so obviously it was in and out of my pocket with wild abandon yesterday. I managed to take a mammoth 64 snaps but don't worry, I've trimmed it down to 19 or so to put up here.

We started off near the bird enclosure. I'm not so keen on birds as they're not very cuddly, but did take a bit of a shine to the vultures. This one was totally givin' me evols.



While these two stubbornly refused to pose for the camera.



Penguins, of course, are the cutest of the bird genre and who could resist this adorable couple? I haven't identified their sex but assume they are conforming to the Gay Sunday agenda.



If you liked it then you should have put a ring on it ... penguins dancing to Beyonce.



The highlight of any trip to London Zoo is MEET THE MONKEYS - the enclosure where little furry spider monkeys run around and swing about above your head and in the trees. I think this one was still in a K Hole from Saturday night.



Monkey and foliage composition.



I got told off for taking the next picture by some old battle-axe of a zoo warden. Apparently I was too close and the monkey was about to steal my camera and then bite me. You can see how ferocious it looks!



The meercats must be sick and tired of 'amusing people' shouting 'simples' and asking if they are updating their website. I certainly was after 30 seconds of listening to it. But perhaps not as bored as when we visited the hippos or gorillas and heard lots of HILARIOUS remarks such as "eh, that looks like you John" or "isn't that your mum?" Fuck's sake. Why can't there be a zoo where there are no other people?



Prairie dogs. I can't think of anything to say about them.



Lion stalking ducks (out of shot.)



Toucan



Gays



Exotic bird perched in tree. Lovely plummage isn't it?



Another thing I got sick of was straight blokes who think they know it all lecturing their girlfriends who, being in possession of vaginas, must know absolutely nothing. Next to a sign clearly marked AFRICAN HUNTING DOG, a man was confidently informing is girlfriend that she was beholding a hyena.

Then, next to the following enclosure, a male homo erectus was informing the female of the species that this was a meercat. No it's not, you twat, it's a bleedin OTTER!!



Still from Ring Of Bright Water.



I have only one cuddly toy in my house and it is a bean-baby giraffe called Johnson. Just thought I'd mention it.



On the way into the aquarium I complained bitterly about people who take photographs of the fish tanks. I then proceeded to do just that.



Stingraaaay, STINGRAY, du-du-du-la, doowop, doowop



I adore the Americans but it cracks me up that they call this an Ee-moo. EE-MOO - hahahaha.



The End.