Oh Dreary Me

Do you ever take some time off work then waste the last day feeling miserable at the thought of having to return? I knew I should have made more effort to go out today, but I fooled myself that if I washed the car and cleaned the flat I'd feel good about myself. I was wrong.

The past week of focusing on DJ and tech jobs has been fantastic, and reminded me how work can be when you enjoy it. But I'm annoyed I've let other things slip by. I'd written a list of things to do and projects I wanted to research. To my irritation I note I have done virtually none of them.

In my defence I have been fighting off a cold, but I also seem to have spent a stupid amount of time sleeping. It's just really, really HATE getting out of bed. And then I get that brain-dead thing where you can't concentrate and just blunder around in a daze. I'm an idiot.

I suppose I do more than a lot of people, but there are plenty of others who put me to shame. And I have this tendancy to sit down to plan the next issue of Tranny Hag and end up spending 2 hours on My Space or X Tube, which results in a scorching self-loathing.

I've got to sort myself out in the coming weeks. There's a few things to look forward to: a theatre trip to see a one-man show about Kenneth Williams, and a tech job at Bistrotheque with the Bears. Best of all I'll be continuing talks about an exciting new project that could bring me 9 more interesting work hours a week. If it comes off I can ask about reducing my hours at the day job - can you imagine?!!

It's far from definite, but just the fact it's a possible fills me with joy. Though I need to be sure I won't waste my extra daytime and will use it to work on my other stuff. I need to give myself a kick up the arse.

Anyone got tips on self-motivation?