Stand By Your Man

Garethwyn alerted me to a very interesting piece in the New York Times about lesbian opposition to FTM transsexuals. Always nice to see intolerance is alive and well in the gay community.

Apparently there’s a feeling in some lesbian quarters that women who transition are letting the side down and joining the enemy. It’s kind of ironic, because when I was coming out in the 80s it was the femme women who were attacked. They were chastised for not being radical enough and still complying with the patriarchal stereotype of how a woman should be. It seems the balance of acceptability must be a very fine line.

It just adds to my ongoing distrust of the controlling aspects of the wider feminist movement – you can swap patriarchy for matriarchy but you still have to do what you’re told.

It also displays an appalling lack of understanding and a paranoia that borders on hysteria. There have been debates on the subject “Is lesbianism dead?” What a ridiculous notion to suggest that all lesbians are suddenly going to ask for sex changes, in fact the two issues are barely connected.

The reason a lot of transsexual women formerly identified as lesbian is because no better category existed, and it takes time to go through the mental processes of self- discovery that can lead one to identify as transsexual or transgender. This journey can often include periods of loneliness, isolation, alcoholism and drug abuse. But never mind your private pain; just don’t go upsetting the sisters.

And what of the men who transition and live their lives are women? Will they be welcomed with open arms by the lesbian community for having crossed the wall and come over to fight the great fight? Of course not, they’ll be treated with suspicion for not being “real” women by those who can’t see further than physical shape.

If the ranks of women who identify as “lesbian” are reducing it could well be for the lack of space that the term provides. Thank god for the invention of gender queer and for the freedom and tolerance it provides.