I Love the Nightlife

I was feeling a little stir crazy and sorry for myself yesterday, so I decided upon some gentle retail therapy and then a quiet drink at Retro with Toby.

I wasn't going to go to Horse Meat Disco where I was until midnight. And I certainly wasn't going to go to Marvellous where I was until 3am. Oh dear! Seems I tested my resolve and found that I have none.

I'm not sure I liked Horse Meat too much. I had been wanting to go for a while and since Sammy Jo was DJing it seemed like a good excuse, especially as he got me in free. The place was very packed and one of the bar staff was a misogynist cunt who wouldn't serve women. Aside from that it was OK, had a nice chat with Justin and then Christof's mum showed me her clit piercings in the toilet. Well actually, she was showing them to anyone who would look - I've never seen queens with such fear on their faces!

I was happier in the familiar surrounds of Marvellous. It was the last Sunday of the month and so Yr Mum, Ya Dad had their club night going on in the room next door. Now, I've nothing against the chaps themselves, they both seem like perfectly nice fellows, but the audience they attract is the most laughable collection of fashion disasters ever. It makes me realise that one of the most enjoyable aspects of getting older is being able to point your finger and laugh at the young.

Some dick walked past us with an album sleeve on her head. I couldn't get close enough to see what it was, but I bet it was something shit like Kate Bush. I'm slightly ashamed to say I goaded on a very drunken Paul from Gladstone Arms to try and set fire to it, sadly something in a pink and blue shell suit stopped him. Probably just as well.

I tasted Justin's lip gloss on numerous occasions, reprimanded Joan Dairy Queen for wearing real fur, bitched about Wayne Shires with Paul the poster guy and then trotted off home. Last thing I remember is part falling down the stairs on the night bus, whacking my knee and staggering out the door muttering "fuck". Well, if you're going to be a drunk, may as well do the job properly.